I heard we made out
trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
If I've learned one thing today? Blow jobs get you to state championships.
Alright. Who did it? Who's bangin' the ump?
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
He is juggling broken glass botttles, I think its time to cut him off...
i think if i got caught drinking at work i could get away with it if i started crying and saying my cat just died. as long as i'm confident.
Just disregard the tooth in the plastic bag in the fridge.
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
It takes a special kind of Adderall to make me go to the hardware store, buy paint, and paint tiny polka-dots on all four of my bedroom walls.
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
My hangover headache is somewhere in the Harry Potter scar neighborhood. I can now empathize with that poor bastard.
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
I think I was just motorboated by a 4-year old girl.
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