I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
U have to come, I miss the sound of you throwing up.
Half the people who compete die. All the rest either lose their minds or grow an innate fear of sharks, vodka, and fishbowls
Ya I know. She's self aware though, like the terminator. Which is the best kind of crazy
And then we can spend New Year's Day sprawled across the tiles watching greys anatomy and puking into the bushes over the balcony. It'll be great
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
You in for a dick vacation?
YES, even though I have no idea what that means
Go tell your boss to go fuck himself because you have beer and doritos and zombies waiting on you
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
Also this time, I didn't have a random creepy guy come up from behind me, grab my junk, and whisper "where's the cocaine?" in my ear. So that's also a win.
The report specifies "melted cheese food" as the cause of the burns. Your pride, like your cock, isn't getting out of this without heavy damage.
Randomize