Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
So there I was praying he didn't go limp again, choking on a long, long gray ball hair. This is my Saturday night. This. Is. My. Life.
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
There was a cop outside the house so we just put the alcohol in this watermelon
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
Are you done yet? I've eaten three corndogs so I'm ready 2 party.
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
I just chased my hot mailman down the street to ask him out and now I am 98% positive he gave me a fake number.
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
Randomize
