its not stalking. its research.
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
Everything was going good until she wanted to update her status...You forgot to close pterodactyl porn from this morning. Clothes went back on.
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
I'm so ready for finals. She finally agreed to skypesex me from spain so now i'm up until 4am studying every morning waiting for her to get online
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
She looked at it and said "your dick is like the golden gate bridge."
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
My dad and I just got asked if "we wanted a more intimate setting for our date". The world is coming to an end.
Well since your going through her phone..look man she loves you..she just loves my dick more
This is exactly why you shouldn't bang your bartender. Although the awkward free shots are a plus.
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
Im riding the bus with beer in one hand and chapagne in the other. I love weddings.
He bought me pizza and bourbon and played scrabble with me. So naturally I slept with him.
Randomize
