I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
so i was trying to be sexy and unzip his pants with my teeth. i got my lip caught in the zipper and it bled for a good 15 min, totally a mood killer.
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
This weekend has taught me that sometimes, being buried under a mattress is the safest place in the room.
I understand why they say don't drink the water in Mexico... I just saw 5 guys piss upstream of where the bar tender went to get the water
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
In last nights drunken stupor i apparently purchased a luxury travel package for two to Australia. So uh...get a passport and clear your schedule for next month
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
I’m going to try to be less of a cryptic bitch this week. Should be nice.
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
Randomize