Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
I'm pretty sure you thought I could absorb alcohol through my dress
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
Do you know who the random guy who just walked in to kiss me goodnight is?
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
Come down here. We are watching people walk through the paper we taped in front of the elevator.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
On one hand it was kinda weird his girlfriends stuff was at his apartment. On the other hand it was kinda nice because she had great shampoo
His gf just liked my changed relationship status. She's gonna shit bricks when she finds out he left her for me. Bless her little heart.
All I've done for this 11 hour car ride is kegel and listen to our sex playlist so your dick better be good and ready
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
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