Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
tequilla shots with my grandparents? christmas visiting just got so much better
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
It hurts to hear and I can smell shapes.
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
He's hot....knda sweaty, drunk smells like feet....but he's hung like a whale....so in other words totally your type
I'M NOT EVEN STOPPING FOR WINE SO I CAN GET TO THAT DICK QUICKER.
I smell Vodka. It's me. If anyone asks it's totally hand sanitizer.
Pro: 2020 made it easier to hook up with strippers
Con: explaining to Kari why there’s always strippers at our house
Pro: there’s always strippers at our house
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