I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
I want Paula Dean to narrate shark week next year
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
These pubs in Ireland act like hand jobs aren't the universal currency
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
It's like....nice talking about real estate but your son gave me herpes
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
Remember when you fed me goldfish while I was -inside- of someone?
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
Dude I can't beleive you didn't wake up. I literally f'd her IN THE DISHWASHER. Btw I'm pretty sure I also kinda broke the dishwasher.
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
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