you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
i'm getting the "you hooked up with my friends" speech from him. i'm returning with the "gotta keep my quota up" speech
the moment we started interpretive dancing last night wouldve been a good time to stop drinking.
I'm pretty sure we put the facepaint on during whippets
Buying a large dominoes pizza for a wasted 3 mile walk is the best bad idea ever. My mouth is on fire, probably broke my hand, and i may or may not have eaten street pizza.
How did you break your hand eating pizza?
Boxes are hard to see rocks through.
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
My pubes were yanked out by the root when they got caught in the condom. I think it's time for a bikini wax.
I forgot how weird my hair bleaches and now I'm a calico
You can wake up to my rainbow of failure
Calm the fuck down fatty, you can add creme de menthe to a vanilla shake any time of the year
omg so there's this guy on the roof and he just stripped for no reason and now i think he's making out on the rooftop with some other guy? who are these people
I think God is sending me all these 20 year olds to make up for wasting my 20's in that crappy ass marriage. Thanks Big Guy!
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
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