I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
I was high enough to think chocolate sauce on bagel bites was a good idea
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
Remember that foreign guy who never talked last night? He just came out of my bathroom when I woke up.
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
I'm going to shower the piss off me now. I feel like I was in an R. Kelly dream.
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
If its possible to have a hickey on your nipple, I have one. Thank you.
I'm trying to get weird tonight. Like I want to see bitches crawling on all fours drinking milk from bowls and shit by 5 am. You down?
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
You want further proof that God hates me? Okay. We're on the way to the ER. A homeless man stabbed me at the gas station.
Randomize
