I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
Yeah, you spent an hour in front of the mirror trying to reenact the Sailor Moon theme song.
in the middle of it he kept shouting: im going to be masturbating to this for the rest of my life
Is it bad that your cum tickles when I swallow it?
If I had a motorized wheelchair, I'd just chase the squirrels on campus all day.
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
The last thing I remember is your grandma calling me a pussy and taking my shot for me. Your family is awesome.
well... I just junk punched a carnie. Doesnt matter how, it still counts for my bucket list.
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
So far I've taken two naps, went out and bought a pizza called the Hipster, and in 15 min I'm gonna make a snow angel. Conquering Snowlandia. How bout you?
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
So I'm just casually at the grocery store when I remember that there's still a clove of garlic in my vagina
Tonight was a total waste of a shaved vagina
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
Randomize