At least make sure they are 18
Why
I'm sorry that you just had your first misguided homo experience
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
Something growled at me in your dark backyard last nt. Hoping it was my landwalking laser sharks and not Andy.
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
We just set the fire alarm off with a fog machine. What's my first instinct? Finish my drink. I think I handled that correctly.
We've reached the point in our fuck buddy relationship where we are playing words with friends. This is too intimate.
Nothing says I'll be 22 tomorrow like washing the vomit out of your hair at 4pm
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
I just plagiarized Dr. Curtis Connor's ideology from Spider-man in an essay on genetically engineered embryos. College: academic integrity at its finest.
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
I’m the skeleton in his closet, but I only come out on Tuesday and Thursday afternoon and when his wife is out of town
Randomize
