you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
I have to start avoiding pregnant women. This is getting out of hand.
She told me to wait on the sofa while she freshened up. She's been in the bathroom for an hour. I have a bad feeling about this.
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
I don't need a lecture. I'm 41. I know I'm an idiot.
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
I'll like his pictures on Instagram every once and a while so that when he sees my name he is reminded of the best blow job he's ever gotten.
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
like, there should be nothing wrong with me wanting to watch you put on a bikini and roll around in a kiddie pool of jello
kick those bitches in the teeth and tell them mama came to party
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
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