one two three fourrrrnication!
It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
no. you can't hotbox the world.
since when did accompanying a guy to a wedding mean that anal was required that night?
words of advice: black light parties reveal cum stained clothing.
Going abroad, it was like my vagina was in a candy store... a sweet sweet british candy store
i came on her dog
I really want to know why half of my kitchen floor is missing.
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
I just held a marble with my kegel muscles for 5 min. You may call me COCKCLAMP 9000!!!!
I tore the muscle in my left calf at the gym and still spent all evening in heels. UNSTOPPABLE!
I'm drunk doing an ab workout. I can only hope I make it to bed tonight.
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
I'm getting drunk off Malibu and watching Drag Race and it's only 2 in the afternoon. I'm the poster child for sad gay men.
Randomize
