Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
In America we eat man semen.
This gyro tastes like lonliness
I blacked out, started puking and peed on the guy I was hooking up with. Mid hand job.
How old are you? 14? Who gives hand jobs anymore?
Salt in an open wound right now.
YOU SUCK AT REPLYING IM IRRESPOSNIBLY DRUNK WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING WITH YOU LIFE. celebrate the magicness with me.
You destroyed the landscape if my vagina FOREVER.
After blacking out and loosing my phone for a month, I found it in the parking lot across the street. Last text "rager in the street". I remember none of this.
I've reached too hung over to move status will you bring me something to drink?
I moved out 2 weeks ago remember?
Can you ship it to me then?
Your topless pictures make me question reality
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
Pencil dick carries the name proudly.
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
For the record you're an amazing lay and you have great taste in breakfast sandwiches
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
why does every cop we meet know your name?
Randomize