So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
So I've been thinking a lot since she told me she's prego. But what I want to know is why my voice of reason sounds like Thomas fucking Jane!?
Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
ok this guy next to me just sat down with a no joke, 10,000 page book, popped an addy, cracked open a red bull and opened the book to page 1.
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
That said I did get head on the roof of a 15 story building which, regardless of quality, is still cool
If you had amazing eyebrows i'd have sex with them.
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
Randomize
