i just shoved 27 marshmallows in my mouth
well thats a nice change of pace from what you normally put in your mouth
she was talking to me but i could help but stare at the extremely long hairs on her boobs. then she says, "your looking at the hair on my boobs aren't you"
I've made out with men from every corner of the globe. Sex-wise, I've almost conquered europe. Take that napoleon
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
I legit just woke up on my couch, snuggled up next to some guy who's wearing my roommate's pink bathroble. What the fuck do they put in those shots?
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
I called to inform you I may or may not be getting laid tonight ...
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