I drew a venn diagram at the top of my final comparing stuff i know and stuff on the test.
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
I just woke up wearing the O-ring from my dildo harness as a bracelet. Classy.
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
I feel like everyone would be happy with that as a present too. "Oh you got me pussy for Christmas?! How'd you know?!"
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
And, through a series of unfortunate events, I am at my grandmothers birthday party in a short dress and no underwear
If you fall asleep, my vagina and I will never forgive you.
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
Blacked in cold and wet, with them areound me singing Aaaaall we are saaaaayiiiing is YOU PEED YOUR PANTS
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
Randomize
