Sponge bath it is.
We need to get cat food
Nevermind, the cat will eat lucky charms
he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
i asked why he had a giant piece of popcorn duct taped to his head and he said "No, it's actually part of my neck." so no, i didn't fuck him.
so i say "rick dont build that sandcastle" and he "says ok i wont" then i wake up and its sandcastle fucking city all over my apartment
Puke, feathers, beads, and solo cups all on my way to class. I'm surprised anyone's alive after this weekend.
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
This is like a walk of shame down memory lane.
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
Randomize
