Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
Until he has ordered mozzarella sticks & beers at 2pm while wearing formal attire, then this is still my bar.
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
this morning your mother said to me "sorry to have to meet you like this, in my sons bed" later she said "you never know whos gonna be in there. its scary sometimes"
That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
No foreplay. Missionary. Too quick. And he owns a fedora.
I almost fell asleep reading that.
I almost fell asleep fucking it.
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
I may have just tried to argue quantum entanglement as the reason I was still in her bed.
You don't know the true meaning of fear until your girlfriend's niece insists on sitting on your lap with 20 mg of Viagra coursing through your veins.
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
I love you. Go after that dick
I would give away three of my own ribs to be able to eat myself out.
...ew
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