someone owes me an orgasm
He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.
he rubbed his balls on my face to wake me up.. this friends with benefits thing is getting out of hand.
i have a wrist watched drawn on my wrist that it says shot o clock
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
Just so we're clear this time around: This is dinner with my FAMILY. Not an opportunity for you to drink too much, and use the word "dick-thumpin" in casual conversation.
I don't know if it is the Everclear or chemistry, but i think my brain is coming out of my ears.
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
We're like adult pinky and the brain when they decided that taking over the world is unrealistic so they aim lower by trying to get drunk every day.
I just ordered cookies for delivery. My life is falling apart.
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
I'm just bringing him "breakfast," and breakfast may lead to lunch and dinner, but that doesn't mean I want the mealplan.
Randomize
