you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
Yaaaayyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyyy! It has more than one y so my intentions to sleep with you after the drink special ends are clear
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
she dared me to make out with the amish dude so I went up to him and grabbed him by the beard
GRABBED HIM BY THE BEARD
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
I can see their wedding vows now: 'Til basicness do us part
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
I guess I called her at 2am, demanding that she bring us food. She told us to order pizza, and I yelled "DON'T MENTION PIZZA!" I recall nothing.
Randomize
