Situation: He got it in my eye, how long do I let it sting before should start to worry?
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
Going to bed. I have to wake up early and teach small children. And then have affairs with their fathers. I'm going to get deported.
Hands down the most disgusting picture message ever received. Thank you.
im here for your entertainment
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
Woke up the day after the party with a bruise on my stomach. Pretty sure my liver was trying to escape for fear of it's life.
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
Random question: Have you ever woken up and were suprised to not have a penis?
I just jerked him off with one hand while holding my wine glass with the other and watching Congo. I feel like this was a preview to my married life...
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
Randomize
