Please tell me how I woke up out in the middle of nowhere wearing nothing but a hard hat and a man thong?
Wearing a Sarah Lawrence sweatshirt is like wearing a shirt that says, "I'm getting a degree in substitute teaching."
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
In other news I saw a pack of make believe zombies walking down green st.
gotta love wednesdays
It's 3 am and my parents just came up the driveway in a limo. They didn't leave in a limo. I'm scared to even ask.
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
Yup, totally tried cooking bacon in the dryer last night.
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
If we don't rescue him from the fat chick soon, she is going to eat him alive and suck the marrow from his bones.
Could you imagine living in a city where bartenders are available by 1:30 AM
I'd have like 4 kids by now and at least one std
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
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