Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
He came on my face and tried to draw out a smiley face because he said I looked like I had a bad day
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.
Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.
Just when I thought he had turned a new leaf, I see a "Let me get you pregnant" shirt in his closet
Apparently HR frowns upon current employees introducing themselves to the new employee as "Hi I'm sleeping with your cousin"
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
He was asleep with his head on a windowsill and you were petting his head, then you almost left the kitchen and then went back to pet him some more.
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
I love how encouraging you are, but I need you to stop me when the guy I'm going home with is a dead ringer for Nick Cage.
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
I feel like I lost a fight with an 800 lb gorilla made of tequila
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
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