are you still at the devil's house?
my drunken desire to be gossip girl continues to ruin friendships for me
What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
I only knew it was midnight because i got happy new years texts while i puked outside
I noticed how good my hair still looked. Apparently rum and coke in it helps it stay curly thru sex. May be using this more often.
She's pissed. She declared she was moving out and proceeded to pack 3 pairs of shoes, her electric wine opener and ONE sock. Then told us to have fun paying her portion of the rent.
I'm drunk on a monday night. Not a good start to finals week
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
How bad is it that I'm banned from all of your family functions due to sleeping w/ both your brother and sister and they both hate me for pursing a relationship with either of them.
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
Randomize
