jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
Just woke up. First thing I see: Little brother eating last night's jello shots thinking they're reg jello.
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
just fought my dog for the chicken pie I dropped on the floor.
He looked at me and said "Last call" before putting his penis away into his boxers
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
She's not a foreskin expert like you
I snapchatted his face mid sex. Needless to say, I don't think I'll ever see him again.
There should be a Doritos delivery van or something.
We just got busted fucking in the hammock by his roommate...I'm so out of here as soon as hes asleep....
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
Randomize