so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
At what point did you actually think that you could throw knives safely?
Year anniversary in a month. Think I'll just give him a COME ON MY FACE FREE card. I'm both broke and shameless.
she asked him to cuddle cuz she was cold and instead he got up, moved the space heater to her side of the bed, and went back to sleep
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
Just once I'd like to do blow in a nice bathroom.
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
Had a guy offer me a shot. But he wimped out when I asked for tequila and instead ordered gummi bear shots. I don't think he has balls. I didn't stick around to find out.
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
lost my vibrator and now I have to masturbate manually. The struggle is fucking real.
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
How’s big weiner McGee?
I’m going to ask you one last time to call him Matt and he’s fine thank you very much
Randomize
