I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
Watching Argentina vs Germany during a wedding on an iPhone. Thank you Steve Jobs.
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
You found me in the back room alone eating someone else's whole birthday cake with my hands then asked me if you could join.
How sad is it that I'm looking in the farm & garden section of craigslist to find a weed dealer. I mean, that's where they'd be right? Just gotta break the code.
You were dancing with a coffee pot of rum in one hand and a joint in the other. So that should explain everything.
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
A valentines day commercial would come on while I'm masturbating...
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
Sorry man, but I'd rather do drugs with strangers than watch sports with you. It's not personal, drugs always beat sports.
Random one night stand with a guy that had a USA tattoo on his ass. Can't possibly get more American than that
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
MASS TEXT: Next weekend I will be in town for St. Patty's day. There will be a bonfire and liqour olympics. We will have booze but in order to participate it is byob. Upon arrival everyone will be asked to sign a waiver. I am not responsible for liver failure, death, loss of clothing or memory, bites, scratches, hickies, pregnancies, or any other for of injury you may obtain while participating. There will be ridiculous amounts of green glitter, be prepared to puke it up. ALSO WEAR SOMETHING GREEN OR YOU WILL BE PENALIZED!! AUTOMATIC 5 SHOTS. HAPPY GAMING!!!
Randomize