"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
4 girls bringing me taco bell. this is what dreams are made of.
I'm going on a valentine's date with the random guy i hooked up with in the bar bathroom this weekend...i feel like julia roberts
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
I successfully convinced a drunk NDSU student that their school does not have a football team and another that they weren't in Fargo. I'm a dangerous sober shark in a sea of drunks.
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
Randomize
