she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
I got kicked out of an open bar wedding reception. The bride "felt threatened" by my presence. Not my fault she's ugly
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
Found a piece of twizzler in my buttcrack.
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
Randomize
