party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
I think I breastfed the cat at some point during the night, at least that's what my nipples are saying
The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
i was driving around baked, windows down jamming to third eye blind and eating grapes for 35 minutes before i remembered why i left my house
Everything smells like beer. Everything. But I cant drag myself out of bed to take a shower. So beer it is.
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
At first I was horrified but then he explained that he shave a "soul patch" on his balls... And I was still horrified, but I went with it.
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
In fairness you've introduced me to a lot of people I've only met once, for like 5 seconds, while drunk
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