Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
I found out why we traded puke covered dresses in the bathroom.
Tell your boss that he's keeping you from eating a fuck sundae off of these 36-24-36 34 D's waiting for you at home on Valentine's Day.
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
Opted for cash back rather than the 10% extra I'd get for store credit, solely for drinks tonight.
You're lovely.
Emoji's do wonders when you actually have nothing at all to say..
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
Hooked up with another cop last night. Think I am renaming my vagina "dispatch"
Yup we found her. The bouncer was carrying her out
What are you, a fucking toaster ?
I don't think getting eaten out in a smart car behind a circle-k on my break by a guy I just met classifies as social distancing, but I'm beginning to love night shift more and more.
Randomize
