that john and kate plus 8 dude has ruined asians for me
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
Ways to know you did something wrong: you sugar-coated it for your therapist.
someone just sent me a bong wrapped in christmas paper in the mail. signed 'santa'.
Woke up with the note 'going outside. Ignore bloody spoon. Be back soon' taped to my forehead. Know anything about it?
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
this is not real life
it never is. after midnight never counts.
announcing that you were the mayor of bjtown got their attention.
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
You know you're in the hamptons when it's 10pm And you kind of want to vomit white wine on rug that costs more than your apartment.
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
He flipped me around so that we could have sex and both watch Die Hard... I think I found my sole mate. Merry Christmas to me!!🎄
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
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