what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
Just crushed a xanax into my chewing gum. Its gonna be a long, fucking up flight...
After he convinced me that my friend had died and come back to life, I decided I was having sex with him that night, and that I should lay off the drugs for a while.
There was a note in my hello kitty underwear telling me "don't go over 9000"
Hey, it was your idea to keep her occupied with the barscanner on your phone.
you didnt need to give her a fucking sharpie. there are handmade barcodes everywhere. including my cock. fucker.
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
I'm sorry if you weren't drunk enough to be peer pressured into the naked dancing/group make out that transpired last night
You told the guy in Wawa you needed his hoagie for "a scavenger hunt" and then called him a "fuckstained Muggle" when he didn't give it to you. You are a delight.
Woke up pants less in the vacant apartment across the hall. It was unlocked because they were showing it to someone. When they walked in I woke up and said "this is a great place to live" and walked out
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
Randomize
