She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
my little brother just caught me blowing my step cousin in the lobby bathroom at our family reunion
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
He kept pouting and saying i cockblocked him and I kept yelling "I'm sorry...but the cock was never out to be blocked"
Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"?
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
Was I just dreaming, or was there a corpse at work last night?
She was just sleeping.
Is it bad that I'm kind of disappointed by that?
thank you for the vibrator recommendation, i've come six times today and it's only noon
Randomize