when you find your car can you pick me up? his mom is here and im hungover
using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
would you kill someone to have someone deliver pancakes to you when you were high?
dont like to call her my roomate, too cordial. i refer to her as the whore that was assigned to live with me
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
When my alarm went off, he rolled over and asked me: Bacon or dick? Yes, I will see him again.
You blacked out and walked in on my neighbor breast feeding at 3am yelling "where is my best friend". I think we should go apologize.
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
think he just told me if I need to shit I should go outside.
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
Do you think Brian would let me smoke while we fuck? I'm not sure ill survive exams without a constant nicotine intake
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
Randomize
