have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
Only your vagina holds the key to what happened last night.
Happy graduation...we are now officially unemployed alcoholics!
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
He started to lose his balance halfway through his "commencement speech" at the top of the staircase. The rest is bloody, profanity-laiden history.
Update: we are pushing the start of day drinking back from 9 am to 10 am. Minor delay.
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
Just called a girl a cunt over peanuts. I think we both know it wasn't just about the peanuts.
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
You know what's even more awkward then buying plan b from someone who is a member at the gym you work at... When they come in after that day and have that look of recognition
Just for the record, you referenced Harry Potter while complaining about being torn between the Slytherin (lesbians) and Gryffindor (your mostly straight friends) houses (tables)
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
I'm going to invent an ap that tests your stress levels before texting and will say something like "nope, go rub one out and try again in 10 min"
I successfully cockblocked 5 people in one night. I wasnt getting any, why should they.
Randomize
