next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
The cops found weed in michael jacksons house today...it makes up for the child molesting, I like him more now.
Some kid in my class just puked in his backpack, zipped up the backpack, put the backpack on and walked out the door.
Having a pigeon watch you poop is just creepy. Drunk or not.
you drew a penis with ranch dressing. tried to take a picture of it and dropped your phone in it. Then made moaning sounds while you licked it off.
I'm eating tomato paste and drinking banana juice that is expired. Can we please get groceries tonight?
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
You try staying up all night fucking a guy with a curved dick and see how much you want to go out after that.
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
I am in a hotel room with 10 people. John is in bed eating an industrial sized pan of mashed potatoes. I think a non insignificant number of people saw my nipples.
My parents heard us going at it in their tent. I told my mom it must have been a bear looking for food. I don't think she bought it. She deliberately chose this park because bears haven't been sighted here in years.
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
He just got back from doing field research studying wild chimpanzees in the goddamn jungle. Obviously I fucked him.
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