yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
My dad just told the waiter to keep the pitchers coming until someone passes out.
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
I shit you not. I was sitting on Brian's balcony...still drunk from the night before, and a hummingbird flew onto the patio, stared me right in the face and flew away. I feel like it was God's way of telling me, "Stop drinking."
He has a bed frame and a headboard.... That match his dresser and nightstand...
Hahah. That's good.
I feel like you don't understand the severity with which this weirds me out...
Wait you actually sent a text to your self saying “love you I miss you"?
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
Pretty sure my boss knows there's Jack smell coming out of my pores right now... He just gave me a look...
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
Woke up snuggling with a large wooden rhino that I stole last night...obviously, we had fun.
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
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