It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
I just febrezed the jizz on my pants and wore them again, gross or eco-friendly?
Eco-friendly.
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
it was a frathouse cornucopia of foul mixed drinks and "sangria", which im convinced was blood and pcp
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
I just ordered 30 klonopins from India that could probably be anything from Viagra to Midol. You need to find another friend to get advice from right now
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
So here's a brief summary of my weekend: last night I drank four glasses of Death Punch, grabbed the toaster, said "This is mine", put it in my pants and walked out the front door.
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
Guess it's not a good idea to try lighting a cigarette with my stove drunk, I burnt off half my bangs.
Omg worst high ever. I'm watching Parks and Rec, and all i can think about is how andy, leslie, and tom are my closest friends. Forever alone.
Randomize