therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
we went to sleep in different beds and woke up spooning. alcohol truly is the anti-cockblocker.
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
You do realize that you tried to eat the neighbors cat because the dominos guy was 5 minutes late. You would have succeeded if we didnt stop you.
I sang Jenna happy bday in the middle of throw up hurls
She tried to sleep on the front steps of her salon so she wouldn't be late for work and these people put her in a cab to my house. She is nothing if not responsible. Can u imagine her boss finding her there this morning?
Employee of the year! :)
I resisted the temptation to hold the cake in one hand to alternate bites with the ruffles I was eating. I decided that might make me look dysfunctional.
OMGGG I JUST SAW A REAL OWL JUST CHILLING ON TOP OF A SIGN POST. I WALKED UP TO HIM AND SAID HOO HOOOOO AND HE TURNED HIS HEAD AT ME AND WAS LIKE YEAHHH BRO
It's Saturday night and I'm sitting on my couch by myself, watching Glee, and drinking gin and tonics. If you listen very closely, you can hear the wails of my mother giving up hope that I will ever give her a son-in-law.
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
My drunk ass is being chauffeured around like the damn queen of England
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