Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
I just told my parents that Capt'n Crunch does weird things to my mouth... my dad just stared at me
Riding home in a carseat. Worst. Night. Ever.
Are you seriously drinking already? It's 11AM. Still morning.
I'm going by McDonald's time. And since they stop serving breakfast at 10:30 and start serving lunch, it is now afternoon.
well yea, now i know i won't get hair in my teeth...
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
on the list of things i learned today that are not stripper poles: ex-boyfriends, table legs, and police officers.
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
We're at the hospital. She got a head rush and fell and now blood everywhere. Smoke the rest, just save her a bowl
BoomCity!!!
You don't have to text me that every time you have sex. I already heard you ring the gong.
I don't know what happened. His phone, shirt, shoes, and the condom wrapper are here but he isn't. I don't even know how to get a hold of him right now
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
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