wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
You know, he picked a really shitty time to stop sleeping with me to pay attention to his girlfriend.
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
I just found a piece of glass in my ear from Saturday.
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
All she said to me before going to get another shot was "Damn, I'd eat her out."
You should feel special! You're also the only person I've ever punched during sex
I'm using emojis for drug deals now. It's time to kill me.
I'm telling you, I 'm beginning to think that my vagina is magical.
Randomize
