I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
I'm not conventionally pretty...I'm just crazy
We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
the day after is always just damage control
dont seek real advice from me tonight cause its always gonna end with we should have sex
I just googled if crying burns calories
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
Love you too. There are very few people I let pee in my dishwasher.
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
No clue what you did last night, sorry. You did hand me a pizza and a mason jar with $1200 in small bills in it when I let you in though.
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
Randomize