I would do horrible things to your vagina.
Prove it.
He ate me out. It was like watching him trying to win a pie eating contest
walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
Don't laugh, but I might need some advice on how to ride a crooked dick.
You sent 2 glasses of water to the table next us and told to the waitress they were on you. I repeat: water
Alls I wanted was a fun New Years but I end up fingering a geico sales representative on a futon and giving her a ride to work the next morning
There it is. Caramel-coated dick. Someone is getting a yeast infection later.
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
THERE IS A MOTHERFUCKING HUMMINGBIRD FLYING AROUND IN OUR HOUSE RIGHT NOW HOW DO I GET IT OUT????
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
we were waffle house and a lady told me her imaginary friend was sitting in the chair next to her. i don't feel so trashy now.
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
Randomize
