so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
Im pretty sure he just said he wants to make a baby with me, but he's pretty shitfaced, so I'm not sure if he knows who I am.
You know it was a challenge blowing out the candles. It was hard to think of a wish, while drunk, with a concussion.
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
my hip hurts so fuckin bad. and I just found a half eaten burrito in my nightstand drawer.
New high score, I made the stripper choke me while I was getting a lap dance last night
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
Randomize
