Earlier, I saw a homeless man that looked like Abe Lincoln, and I just saw a guy walk past wearing crocs and socks. I'm beginning to like this city less and less
Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
i could't wear that belt anymore, it was gonna make me keep shitting for the rest of the night
[insert really romantic bullshit about how much i love you and how beautiful you are so you will suck my dick tonight]
Beer Popsicles are better in theory
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
HE TRIED TO HIT ME WITH A CHAIR. Stoned video games are NOT happening again
Stop watching porn on my work computer.
STOP WORKING ON MY PORN COMPUTER.
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
I just did my taxes to sober up, I'm THAT hungover
IM HAMMERED AND JUST HAD CHEESECAKE THAT MADE ME FEEL LIKE NO MAN HAS EVER MADE BE FEEL BEFORE.
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
Randomize
