problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
A few issues tonight. 1) Drunk since 1pm. 2) At the bar at 4pm. 3) James brought his sister, who has enormous breasts, isnt shy about cleavage, obviously slutty, and makes me want to do things that would even have Atheists sending me to hell. However, she's wearing glitter, so all Im thinking about is Edward Cullen. Go ahead and rip up my Man Card.
I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
So I totally just remembered that you tried to smoke a hornet out of it's nest.
I just called my mom 'Napoleon bronaparte'. I need to stop hanging out with you.
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
Last night I had a sex dream about Trudeau, he hasn't even been prime minister for 24 hours
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
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