I'm done trying to be a vegetarian. My vagina smells like hummus.
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
I should show up to the gym drunk more often. I felt like i really motivated all the fat people.
Friends bring friends secret work margaritas. my pink water bottle is in the cupboard
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
Apparently I gave a guy a hand job on the dance floor. ON THE DANCE FLOOR.
Randomize
