Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
Define "chronic" masturbator.
I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
why do guys feel they can ask questions when im blowing them? you'd think they'd know my answer will always be "mmhmhmhmmm"
Oh and then this old man who saw it happen goes "don't do that"
Hahaha what a helpful old man. Like you thought it was normal to be spilling gas everywhere.
Dude we got so high last night. I said "watch this" threw a goldfish cracker in the toilet, and laughed my ass off. We watched the dvd menu for 30 minutes too.
I'm walking down the halls of our hotel and listening for sex noises and knocking when I do.
Her best friend sent her a random hate text and the song they played at her father's funeral came on the radio. I just got cock blocked by the universe
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
I'm not saying I haven't been that drunk. I'm just saying I haven't been that drunk and then have cops buy me shots.
Can you tell me why Star Wars Burlesque is pulled up on my phone from last night?
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
Randomize
