I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
Pretty sure they aren't letting me back to karaoke night after I screamed "fuck every one of you tasteless hillbillies!!" because I felt they didn't clap loud enough for Jen.
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
IT'S A FUCKING GIANT POKEBALL MAD OUT OF TINY ROSES
Someone I just met told me they were going to name their kid after me. Daylight savings is weird.
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
Hey do you remember me?
You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
Randomize
